Loosening Restrictions on Peptides While Banning Hemp?

Where's the fucking health or science sense in THAT?  We're talking about a group of unapproved, largely unstudied compounds that are mostly INJECTED into the body being pushed through without clinical trials.  This would basically be unprecedented in the course of U.S. medicine as far as I can recall.  Here's the list of specific peptides they're looking to approve (by "they" I mean Rob-rickety Fucking Kennedy, of course)

Various & sundry peptides still too unknown to have brand or even street names

This comes in the middle of the most embarrassing, pathetic trial of a public health official in any nation's history as we battle the biggest outbreak of cyclosporiasis (explosive diarrhea due to intestinal parasite) on Earth.  Once again, the U.S. is Ground Zero for a contagious disease, even as we put our public health officials on trial for {checks notes} doing too much during the deadliest disaster in American history.  Every other nation on Earth paid their citizens to stay home and not spread the disease, but we're tantruming about being asked nicely to wear masks and stay home for a few weeks. 

This year has also seen a return of screwworm in American cattle and the worst measles outbreak in 35 years.  A few people have died or experienced organ failure from consuming raw milk against all professional advice to the contrary (campylobacter & listeria).  Oh, and 20 million eggs have been recalled due to Salmonella contamination.  There's been more death and disease this year but I'll stop here because nobody seems to care much anyway.  

Seen this movie before...

Actually, no I won't.  The outrageous rate of cyclospora in the U.S where it's not even endemic raises the question:  what's causing it to spread unchecked & sicken so much of the population here compared to the rest of the (un)developed world?  Is it a lack of food safety in the fields down in Mexico where iceberg lettuce is grown?  Poor individual hygiene in our everyday lives?  (The disease has been linked to swimming pools and splash pads, as the parasite isn't killed by chlorine and apparently people don't know how to wipe properly or choose to drag babies with shitty diapers through these shared cesspools... or something.  I'd rather not think too hard about the details, honestly). 

The same thing happened with HIV/AIDS in the early days as well as COVID, the latter of which consistently sickened and killed more Americans than any other nationality for every single day of the pandemic.  How does a disease that started in the Congo (AIDS) or Wuhan (allegedly) get such a foothold in the U.S.A. to the point that it's more prevalent & deadly here than in all the overcrowded, impoverished nations on Earth... some of which lack clean water, indoor plumbing and other basic amenities?  Places like Manila, New Delhi, Haiti, Papua New Guinea (lacks water/sanitation services) & heavily polluted areas in Russia, China & other places contaminated with nuclear fallout or toxic immune-destroying chemicals... somehow the U.S. consistently ranks worse than ALL of those when it comes to infectious diseases like HIV/AIDS, COVID, hospital-acquired fungal infections and now cyclosporiasis.  

The U.S. ranks among the worst nations on Earth for treatment-resistant fungal infection.

Warped Priorities

Yet even in the midst of this carnage, our oh-so-valiant government has found the time and energy to target the hemp/CBD industry and 7-OH products, with several states/cities banning kratom altogether.  A flood of hysterical media hit pieces warning of the diverse harms of pot, which apparently range from higher stress levels in the mornings to "slower cognitive gains" in teenage weed users (fucking duh) has become impossible to avoid lately.  But why?  Ope, here we go.  Finally, the real reason for this deluge of Reefer Madness-era fear mongering leaks out at the same time:  

As reported in Time, NY Post, Wall Street Journal & others.

Whoomp, there it is.  Peptides don't directly compete with alcohol, tobacco, caffeinated products or the recreational Rx mind-altering drugs pushed by pharma/doctors/private insurers, as they're not "fun" in the way THCa or kratom/7-OH are.  They could eventually be patented by pharma, either as Rx drugs or dietary supplements, unlike plant-based kratom or weed.  But in many ways, peptides are far more dangerous, the #1 way being that they're primarily injected into the body, which puts them directly into the bloodstream along with any contaminants or adulterants that might be present.  Allergic or sensitive to the peptide itself?  You're screwed because now it's in your body and there's no pumping it from your stomach or otherwise retrieving it.  Do not pass 1st pass metabolism, do not lose 50% oral bioavailability. 

I already covered the major known and unknown risks of peptides here.  And yes, there have been deaths.  Some of them horrific and agonizing.  The risks of injecting peptides are no different than shooting heroin, fentanyl or any other drug, as it's not the drug itself that causes all the complications but the injection process:  the dirty needle, the air bubble/embolism, the unknown adulterants/cutting agents in the wholly unregulated drug...




Anything But the Bare Minimum

Sure, YOU were the ones who were gonna make it happen.  Like the rest of your party didn't.

This peptide decision is understandably controversial af, so time will tell whether it comes to pass.  But the very notion that it MIGHT is offensive considering the current state of public health in this country.  All we really need is universal healthcare like the other developed nations--affordable access to GLP-1s and other lifesaving drugs, surgeries and treatments--not a flood of MK-ULTRA level Frankenstein drugs made in some Chinese guy's bath tub.  Healthy food in all communities; safe rec centers, gyms & ball fields for kids.  Decent medical centers in rural areas and inner cities.  You know, the things all proper countries have.

All plants from hemp to opium poppies should've BEEN legally available to consenting adults since they grow out of the fucking ground & are a less harmful option than their highly concentrated/potent synthetic cousins, while parents should be held responsible for the choices of their minor children.  Not you, me or the DEA.  The people who chose to crap them out.  Personal responsibility and all, right?  If your kid is morbidly obese, kills a car full of people while driving high on 7-OH or huffs computer duster and cannibalizes his English teacher, society doesn't lose access to those substances for legitimate uses--the parents of THAT child go on trial and the kid is placed in the appropriate treatment or detention facility as determined by a judge and/or jury. 

But no, that's too sane and simple.  We'd be lost without our constant stream of fear mongering & outrage porn.  What would we clutch our pearls over if not the latest drug craze sweeping the nation ®?  

For the (probably not) last time: if you can't see that this has NOTHING to do with the relative safety/risk of the drugs in question, you're beyond help.  These laws aren't made by people even smart enough to KNOW the risks/benefits of the things they're banning, so how could it be?  It's all about their own weird vendettas and biases (read: campaign funding & favors), none of which have a damn thing to do with protecting the public.  If they were, why are literally poisonous plants like scopolamine, Datura & castor bean (ricin) perfectly legal?  If you wanna ban plants you should've started there!

(For those convinced that 7-OH is all bad/no good and must be banned, here's Hamilton Morris's incredibly unemotional, sane take.  I've never personally used it and have no desire to, but banning it is a retarded idea, especially when something as dangerous as untested injectable peptides are about to be pushed through without due cause by our ex-junkie HHS Secretary.  There's a sentence I never thought I'd have to utter).  

🤢

Buying Weed on the Internet (Legally!)

Was anybody gonna tell me you can buy weed legally on the internet now?  🙎🏻‍♀

I usually stay reasonably informed about such things but somehow missed this, probably due to the flood of fearmongering about "delta-8" and related garbage.  Unless I'm missing something huge (a distinct possibility), this is the biggest thing to happen in drug law since marijuana was legalized in Colorado in 2012.  While "CBD flower" aka hemp always resembled "real" cannabis to the naked eye, now it has all the same potency and recreational effects too.  

Short version:  Hemp growers found a loophole in the 2018 Farm Bill that allows them to grow hemp plants that are high in a compound called THCa and low in delta-9 THC (the banned substance).  While inactive in its natural form, THCa coverts to delta-9 THC as soon as it's heated and inhaled, making the effects indistinguishable from those of "regular" weed.  It's even grown using the exact same methods according to Google. 

Well slap me & call me Slater

What's THCa?  Think of it as a pro-drug of Delta-9 that's comparable to Vyvanse > dextroamphetamine or Levodopa > dopamine.  It's inactive until it enters the body & undergoes the necessary chemical changes to produce effects.  There are a number of drugs like this, it's just that THCa is produced naturally by a plant instead of in a lab.  It induces the same high as regular medicinal or recreational cannabis--no shady synthetic cannabinoids or "delta-8" necessary.  As far as I can tell, there are no catch-22s with this product, though I've only started looking into it.  The downside:  Trump's already got it slated to become illegal in November, 2026.

How could our lawmakers overlook something this huge?  Because they're lawmakers, not scientists or chemists.  Just like all their other woefully inadequate drug bills, they left the door wide open for people smarter than them to walk through, though they may slam it shut at any time.  🚪👋🏻  Enjoy it while it lasts and don't abuse it like the kratom vendors have done with 7-OH.   

If we want to be trusted with freedom of choice, we have to be trustworthy.  Prove that you can manage legal cannabis without resorting to something stronger or going insane and blaming the drug.  Don't buy it and resell it to minors or market it as something it's not.  Don't make crazy-potent extracts & sell them in gas stations where kids can buy them (probably already happening).  Make responsible choices.  This goes equally for users and vendors of THCa products.  Don't be the asshole that gets this banned by doing something foolish & ending up on the news.  (That said, lawmakers would be wise to leave it be if they truly care about protecting the public from harmful products like delta-8, Spice, 7-OH, tianeptine, salvia 80x, bath salt stimulants and all the other grey-market drugs they claim to hate & fear so much. 

It's abundantly clear the general public wants more legal intoxicant options than alcohol, tobacco & caffeine--better this than 99% of what's out there).  Clearly they DON'T care though, or else they wouldn't be banning all hemp/CBD products at the end of this year!  So I guess stock up while you can and prepare for whatever hellish replacement drug will take its place.  I'll be sitting that one out, as weed isn't so important to me that I'm willing to risk my life and health to use any old synth 'noid.

Here's an interesting Reddit AMA from a licensed THCa hemp grower from a YEAR ago (seriously, how did I not know this was a thing before now?!).  As for me, I'll be perusing the popular shops and seeing what they've got on offer.  Look for a review or two sometime soon.  😶‍🌫

THCa offerings from around the web

Mysteries, Unsolved: The Oakville Blobs

 


A strange thing happened in a little town called Oakville, Washington.  On August 7, 1994, it started raining.  Or at least that's what residents thought was happening at 3:00 a.m. as their roofs were pelted.  But it wasn't rain--far from it.  What was coming from the sky were opaque gooey blobs of unknown origin.  They were about the size of a grain of rice and smeared "like glue" on windshields.  These goo-storms would happen 6 times in a 3 week span.   

Doing what any normal curious person would do, many Oakville residents went outside and inspected the alien material or collected it for later testing.  And then they got deathly ill:  vomiting, respiratory distress & vertigo among other symptoms cropped up and spread to other family members.  The only thing they had in common was touching the blobs.  Not eating or inhaling them:  just handling them.  Animals died.

Here's a firsthand report by an affected Oakvillian:

Best report on the subject I can find

The case was so strange it was featured on Unsolved Mysteries in the late '90s, a big deal back then.  A few samples were sent in for testing but the substance largely cleared up quickly, leaving no trace.   The few results we have refer to it as "an organic substance lacking cell nuclei".  So in other words, it was full of prokaryotic cells like those found in bacteria.  Speaking of, 2 bacterial strains were found in the samples:  Pseudomonas fluorescens and Enterobacter cloacae.  

So what WAS this strange substance and where did it come from?  A commercial airplane dumping biohazardous waste on the community?  A covert military op?  Aliens? 👽  To this day, all we have are guesses.  I know of no substance that can cause such a severe illness merely by touching it, especially not something bacterial in origin.  You'd have to ingest or inhale it for that.  Was it radioactive?  Full of heavy metals like mercury that create toxic vapor?  Numerous theories exist, but none can fully explain:

1.) the repetitive nature of the event, (6 times total in 3 weeks);

2.)  how the substance could cause illness merely by touching it;

3.)  what would cause the substance to rain down in storm-like fashion from the sky, and

4.)  the fact that it's happened again 30+ years later, this time in Rochester, WA.  And this time, there are pictures.  The substance allegedly "melted" at room temperature.  Oddly, residents reported no illnesses or mysterious death this time around.  

Rochester "blobs"

What's going on in Washington state that's causing the sky to rain jelly?  Could the illnesses and animal deaths in 1994 have been caused by something else, like a bad stomach virus or food poisoning from a local restaurant?  Might the samples have been contaminated with bacteria in the lab?  Gimme your best theories in the comments below.  

DJ Envy Has an Announcement to Make:

 

That's it.  That's the article.  This guy isn't an outlier either.  Not even close.  This story popped up in my Instagram feed for god-knows-what-reason so now you have to see it too.  

Another day, another reason I'm ecstatic to be gay. 🌈 🏃🏻‍♀   🧎💨💩

The Pitfalls of Intermittent Reinforcement in Parenting

How inconsistent discipline leads to bad behavior.

 


You know what's worse than never disciplining your kid?  Only disciplining them some of the time.  Yep, it's true.  This is the big secret that "they" don't want you to know.  Who's "they?  The people who own social media, casinos, the drug pushers & those who peddle other potentially addictive things. 

That's because nothing gets you hooked faster than intermittent reinforcement, i.e. the unpredictable nature of a thing.  Last time you checked your Facebook updates they were dry, but THIS time there could be a message from your crush!  Last time you went inside your favorite store it was picked-over and pricey, but THIS time there could be a huge sale!  The last 3 times you played slots at the casino you lost money, but THIS time.... you get the picture.  💌🏬🎰

This is how it works with parenting too.  If you threaten a punishment but only follow through some of the time for that behavior, the kid will learn that you're not reliable and they'll test you to see whether they can get away with it this time.  It becomes a game of chance with a slightly addictive quality.  The same applies to animal training to a lesser extent.  Hence why it's so important to be consistent with your consequences.  Nobody enjoys hearing their kid scream or throw a fit, but that's a sign the consequence is working.  Discipline isn't supposed to inspire joy & merriment, after all.  What you DON'T want is a defiant unfazed reaction or for them to perpetually test you, which they won't if you're consistent. 

Aside from this, children need clear boundaries and predictable consequences so they know how to obey you.  If expectations feel like a moving target, it confuses them.  You don't have to be perfect, just consistent.  Letting things slide or "picking your battles" is bad because it creates confusion for the child so get clear within yourself about what behaviors you're absolutely not willing to tolerate from them.  Everybody gets tired at times; the important thing is to create a routine you can stick to every day.  Don't let the child string out more toys than you're willing to get down on the floor to pick up & take away if they misbehave, for example.  And never make a threat you're not willing to follow through on swiftly if need be.  That's the definition of intermittent reinforcement.  Once they learn your threats are empty, they will defy you every time.  Why wouldn't they?


Here's how you do it:

1.  Give 1 clear, concise warning. 
"____ (Kid's name), we don't hit! If you hit again, I'm taking away your ___."

2.  Follow through on the warning.  
"Okay, you hit again so now I'm taking the ____." 

No apologies, no yelling or further explanation, just do it.  Do not interact excessively with them during punishment no matter how much they scream or protest.  

3.  After the discipline is over, offer a brief explanation & resume play.   
"_____ (name), you can play with your blocks again if you won't hit anymore.  Hitting hurts and makes people feel real bad, ouchie.  That's why we don't hit.  If you're needing space, ask them to please back up or tell Mommy but never hit.  Okay?  Let's go try again."

Your interaction here should be short & not feel like more punishment.  The purpose is to make sure they understand why you disciplined them and let them know the slate is clean now.  

Discipline Options That Work

Save this for AFTER the discipline part is over.

Taking away privileges or creature comforts (TV, toys, outdoor time, electronics*, etc) is great, as is sending them to their room with the door shut.  Time out in the "naughty corner" works too.  Do these for the number of minutes corresponding with their age (i.e. 6 minutes for 6-year-olds, 10 minutes for 10-year-olds, etc).  Grounding teenagers or taking away phones* or other electronics is a good option too.  No need to make a big show of it, just DO it after giving 1 warning.  Do not stand there with them in time out & talk or lecture them--just walk away & leave them to it.  When it's over, then you can explain your reasoning and comfort the child if you like.  There must be a clear distinction between the Warning, Discipline and Resuming of Normal Activity stages.  Make sure not to raise your voice while they're being disciplined as this encourages escalation.

Crying, yelling or other forms of non-destructive expression are fine while in time-out as long as they stay put.  If they trash their room while on punishment, do not force them to clean it up immediately  Instead, help them regulate their emotions & get calm first.  Make sure no sharp items are accessible & focus on calming exercises for you both like counting or deep breathing.  Yelling or forcing them to pick the things up while they're still agitated will feed into a power struggle and make things worse by increasing adrenaline.  Once they're 100% calm and the crying has stopped, let them know the mess must be cleaned up before their privileges are restored.  Do not give in on this point or the ultimate lesson will be that they can tear things up and not pick them up.  It may be the next day before it gets done, but make sure THEY do it.

If they're younger than 7, hold their hand and help them clean it up.  If they're older than 7, calmly let them know the mess is their responsibility.  If they refuse to clean or continue being destructive, they lose access to their belongings, electronics, or social activities until the space is tidied.  Never use food as a bargaining tool or "treat" as this promotes an unhealthy relationship with eating.  Stick to non-essential comforts like TV and video games, toys, outings with friends, allowance money, internet, music and other recreational things they enjoy.  All a kid really needs is a mattress with a pillow and blanket, 3 healthy meals a day, a bath, clothes, a roof over their head, medical care and transportation.  Everything else is extra and can be taken away if they don't behave properly.  Healthy discipline is more about removing privileges than adding threatening punishments like yelling, cursing, hitting or forced labor.

Never hit your child and try your best to avoid cursing or raising your voice in their presence, as these things simply don't work.  The way you behave when frustrated or angry models to your child how THEY should behave when angry, so don't be surprised if they act just like you or the other adults in their orbit.  You can preach until you're blue in the face but it's what you DO that matters.  Parents who hit raise children who hit, be it animals, other smaller kids or other adults when they grow up.  Losing your cool in front of them is bad because it encourages power struggles & continues the cycle of rage and violence.  Turning around and punishing them harshly for behaving exactly like their adult role models is not only counterproductive but abusive.  Maintain your (outward) sense of calm while following through on your warnings and you win every time.

(And of course nobody's perfect.  Every parent screws up; the important thing is sitting down with your kids after you've calmed down and letting them know you messed up and are sorry.  Tell them exactly what you did wrong, what you'd do differently next time and why it's important NOT to behave like that.  It's what you'd want them to do, right?)

｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡

* Giving your kids/teens phones and other internet-connected devices is a dangerous proposition that puts them at risk of countless bad outcomes, a few of which include:  sextortion, grooming and abduction by sexual predators, cyber bullying, body image issues, online scams, reputational damage due to things they post online, targeting by dangerous drug dealers, sex trafficking, deadly "viral challenges", exposure to violent or explicit sexual content, unwanted/accidental purchases, grooming by terrorists/extremists and self-harm communities.  To name a FEW perils.

You ALWAYS have the right to say no; in fact it's your job as a parent to do so with things that endanger your child or could rob them of their innocence.  Delaying internet access as long as possible is highly advisable.   Kids can't truly consent to all the things that could happen online; most adults aren't even fully aware of the risks they face online.  If they need an internet-connected device for school, get a desktop or laptop computer with content filters and put it in the family room where you can supervise their activity.  If they need a cell phone to keep in touch with you in case of emergencies, get them a "brick phone" with calling/texting capabilities and a few games.  Their childhood will be much richer and safer, plus they won't be plagued with a shortened attention span, reading/comprehension difficulties & all the other physical, emotional, behavioral & learning difficulties caused or made worse by online devices.

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Sexual Strangulation: Never Safe or Sane

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Greener Pastures: Why Modern Relationships Don't Last

 

Why don't relationships last these days?  It's a question I hear a lot and one of the last conversations I had with my late grandma, who was married to my grandpa for over 70 years.  She barely survived a year after he passed and while I knew they loved each other, I always thought he needed her far more than she needed him, as he was the "stay at home" partner.  But I'd badly misjudged their relationship.  💔

I've noticed several glaring reasons relationships today fail so fast, most of which boil down to pathetically short attention spans & sensation-seeking behavior & refusal to work for delayed rewards.  This isn't entirely the younger generation's fault as a lot of it stems from having devices shoved in their faces since birth.  But some of it is just egotistical "me-me-me" behavior... having no regard for the other person's feelings.  People want to be in the falling-in-love stage perpetually but bail when shit gets real.  Not even hard or stressful, just slightly less exciting and novel.  When the conversation shifts to bills, laundry, taxes, doctor's appointments and all the other tedious parts of day-to-day life that aren't overly stressful but also not enchanting & magical... things any long-term couple will have to deal with in addition to the really big stuff like money problems, communication issues, health woes and much more.  Speaking of technology (huh?)...

📱💻  Relationships today don't last because people keep one foot in the relationship and the other in dating & hookup apps, social media and other online platforms where inappropriate relationships are secretly nurtured as a Plan B (and sometimes Plan C, D, etc).  They never stop playing the digital field, keeping many eggs in many baskets while allegedly being faithful in meatspace.  When you have a big blowout fight & send them to the couch to reflect overnight, they're actually checking their DMs to distract themselves and boost their ego rather than thinking about it at all due to an inability to sit with uncomfortable thoughts.  And then you wonder how they moved on so quickly after you broke up...  


🗣🤔  Relationships today don't last because people let their family and friends get in their head, criticizing their partner to a toxic and unhealthy degree.  Of course you should listen if they're concerned about something like verbal/physical/financial abuse, serious addiction problems or other illegal, abusive behaviors, but if their concerns are strictly superficial--looks, age, income, race, sex/gender, religion, etc--that's none of their business because it has no bearing on whether the person is capable of loving you & meeting your emotional needs in a romantic relationship.  They should only care about your happiness/safety and that you're not being put in harm's way.  Things like "take your time and get to know them before committing" are always sound advice & should be welcome.  "He's 50 lbs. overweight" & "she's not in our social class" are not.  

They may mean well, but it's common for loved ones to overstep here because it's easy to project what they want for themselves onto you.  You just have to be willing to put up a firm boundary because talking behind a partner's back accomplishes nothing and tends to worsen relationship problems & create new tensions within the family.  If you're truly concerned about something, talk TO your mate or seek advice from a neutral 3rd party like a therapist, (sane) religious authority or couples' counselor. 


🪞👸🏻  Relationships these days don't last because people want a carbon copy of themselves rather than someone who complements them and creates a balanced unit.  This is due to rising rates of narcissism, a nasty condition that demands a mirror image rather than someone who will dissent and challenge one's own views on things or require any amount of compromise.  The old saying "opposites attract" isn't ringing true anymore for this reason, and it's further weakening the already fractured family unit. 

A healthy relationship should be a democracy, not a cult of personality.  Couples break up at the first little disagreement or difficulty, throwing away what could've been a great bond had they stayed and worked at it.  That requires patience, assertive two-way communication and cooperation for those who weren't aware.  While some issues like wanting/not wanting kids are instant deal breakers, most other differences can be worked through with enough communication and mutual respect.

U.S. divorce rates spiked in the '70s & have remained high

👷🏼‍♀👩🏽‍🔧  Relationships today don't last because both partners work outside the home and often longer than the standard 8-hour workday (often for no overtime and sometimes for no pay at all for those extra hours), leaving little time or energy for connection.  Unfortunately this isn't always a matter of choice, but how you spend your downtime certainly is.  My rule of thumb:  It's fine to cancel plans or change them at the last minute occasionally--emergencies happen--but your partner should not be the only person you feel comfortable doing this with.  If it's always the partner and never the coworker, friend, boss or acquaintance that takes the raincheck, that's a lack of respect that will eventually lead to resentment. 

My family has had several 50, 60 & 70+ year marriages and every last one consisted of couples where 1 person worked and the other stayed home.  It wasn't always the woman who stayed home, nor was it always to take care of small kids.  If there's no one focusing on the home and relationship--planning date nights regularly, letting the repairman in, doing the laundry/vacuuming/dusting/windows/other chores; dealing with the landlord or nosy neighbor, making a monthly budget, running that last-minute errand before the bank or store closes, booking the flight, planning the romantic getaway, handling lawn & landscaping tasks & doing the 101 other tasks that go into keeping up a home and relationship--it can pile up and create additional stress for the couple. It might be unpaid work, but it IS work.  Only in the last 30 years or so did society start viewing it as laziness and we're paying dearly with our divorce rates and feral children.  

Also, when partners become 2 ships passing in the night while forming little "work crushes" with coworkers because that's who they spend all their time with, little problems can snowball fast.  If at least one person isn't doing that, it helps anchor the relationship to a firm foundation.  It has nothing to do with women specifically having jobs, it's the fact that it's no longer a choice and that even a 2-partner income is often not enough to cover the cost of living when you factor in college debt, medical costs, childcare, housing and all the rest.  That's a lot of stress on a relationship.  That was not the case in my childhood when one person (a man) could support a whole family on his income alone without a college degree & retire at 55 with a fat retirement package/401k & something to leave for his 4 kids.  This was at an "unskilled" manual labor job, mind you.

📸🤩  Lastly, modern relationships don't last because people are more concerned with appearances than reality.  The superficial surface shit.  Looking happy > being happy.  Style over substance.  Impressing friends, family, community & even strangers.  More effort goes into the wedding than the marriage...  The photos of the trip than the actual vacation...  The outfit and decorations than the event itself.   One day your friend's gushing about how HAPPY they are in their relationship and the next week they're single as a Pringle.  The rule of thumb is that the more vocal about being "happy" a person is, the less happy they are in reality. 

True happiness is evident in a person's smile, their laughter, their glow and aura.  The way they elevate others & light up a room when they walk in.  One thing they don't do is throw around the world "happy" constantly.  True contentment and joy require you to be present in the moment, which means not focusing on convincing others or putting on an act.  It requires ongoing effort to sustain, and if you're putting that effort (or money, time, etc) into maintaining the facade, we know where it's not going.  Better to keep your private life private and let people fill in the blanks.  It's fine to take pride in how certain big things look but not at the expense of your quality of life.  It's okay to be real and vulnerable--to not be "winning" all the time.  In fact, it's human.  

. 。・゜✭・.・✫゜・。.. 。・゜✭・.・✫゜・。.. 。・゜✭・.・✫゜・。.. 。・゜✭・.・

So what's this single woman doing giving relationship advice?  The same thing I'm doing giving my unsolicited opinion on everything else on this blog.  Take it or leave it.  😛  I would've stayed in my last relationship forever if it was up to me.  I'm about as low-maintenance as they come and am generally easy-going as long as I'm not being cheated on, lied to or demeaned.  I'm not perfect but I'm not deceitful or confused about what I want in life either.  Alas, it was she who had a midlife crisis and broke every promise she ever made about who she was (not actually gay) and what she really wanted in life (children at 40).  So be it. 

I'm perfectly content with my solitude and controlling every aspect of my daily life without the drama of an unstable relationship.  I used to think I could never survive living completely on my own, but it turns out I'm equally happy single or in a healthy relationship as long as it's low on the unnecessary drama.  So I'll let fate decide.  What's meant for me won't miss me.  I have to believe that.  🌠